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Cole Johnson 🕺's avatar

I love basking in the beauty and serenity of an early morning sunrise.

The duality of movement and stillness in any given moment as well as when I’m immersed in my bachata dance 🕺 practice fills me with a sense of connection unlike anything.

And in the words of my friend from this morning, I’m “a gem of a human” 🥹 Hearing, feeling, and seeing that I am impacting others by showing up as myself means to world.

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Alexandria Marrow's avatar

Cole, I love hearing from you! It’s so awesome to learn more about you. There’s nothing like a beautiful sunrise or sunset. I’ll never forget watching the sun rise over the beach in Barcelona after a wild night of dancing during my college study abroad trip. 🕺 Such a vibe!

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kamaria's avatar

Loved this. I’ve had a couple rude awakenings when I left certain corporate spaces and those really challenged me. I knew who I was, but it felt like no one else did. I vowed to not make work my identity anymore. Thanks for sharing and I’m def putting those questions in my pocket.

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Alexandria Marrow's avatar

I'm happy to hear from you Kamaria and it sounds like your experiences have shaped your perspective in a meaningful way. How do you feel now that you've made such a powerful shift? Thanks for reading!

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Antonio's avatar

Another great piece Alexandria! And a very relevant topic that I often thought about when I first arrived to New York. It's easy to assimilate into the culture here but then you turn yourself in to a cliche. I love that you're challenging the narrative that work defines your worth. And, reminding people that true relationships aren't built on what another person can do for you but what you and that person can experience together in life. Can't wait to your next piece!

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Alexandria Marrow's avatar

Thank you, my friend!! Can't tell you how much your text lit me up. See you soon.

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Wasim's avatar

Thanks Alexandria. This was a great read. Loved your questions as well. I wonder though if our hesitation to answer such profound questions stems from forgetting how to sit with stillness. In a culture that celebrates the doing, the being gets overshadowed. But what if we reclaimed that space? What if we allowed our answers to emerge slowly, like stars in a darkening sky? Instead of asking, “What do you do?”, perhaps we could explore, “When do you feel most alive?” Or even, “What’s a memory you hold close, one that feels like it still shapes you today?” These questions, like yours, reach for the roots, not the branches. They ask for the stories that can’t fit on a resume or some LinkedIn profile (or even Substack for that matter :).

Thank you for reminding us that identity isn’t a checklist; it’s a mosaic of all the ways we love, reflect, and connect. Reading your reflections feels like being handed a mirror and asked to look beyond the surface. The answers are often elusive, but perhaps that’s the point. To sit with the question, to let it unfold, and to remember that we are enough even in the in-between spaces of who we are and who we are becoming.

Thank you again!

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Alexandria Marrow's avatar

Your words are a gift, Wasim. I love the shift you suggest from “What do you do?” to questions like “When do you feel most alive?” or “What’s a memory you hold close?” These invite us to go deeper and really share the pieces of ourselves that make us who we are. And the way you phrased it—“reaching for the roots instead of the branches”—is just brilliant. Thank you for taking the time to read, reflect, and share your thoughts with me. It’s a reminder of why I write and how much connection really matters.

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Wasim's avatar

Thanks Alexandria. Much appreciated. Let's stay connected and subscribed to each other to share more stuff in the future. Best..

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Aleah Marrow's avatar

Alexandria, this is a fantastic article. I love how you captured we are more than “what we do.” How often do people make their job their personality and nothing beyond that? Beautiful reminder to be in touch with WHO you are and not just what you do.

Thank you for sharing.

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Alexandria Marrow's avatar

It makes me so happy that you enjoyed it. 💛 Thank you for reading and joining the conversation here. Xx

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donnaié.'s avatar

“But somewhere along the way, what we do seems to have eclipsed who we are in the headlines of our lives.”

I agree with this sentiment. I’ve had many moments where people in my family would ask me, “well what are you doing?” And I used to hesitate 😪 it can be hard, wondering how people respond. These days I like watching people light up when I tell people I’m a writer.

I’m definitely going to use “What’s been lighting you up lately?” as a conversation starter ☺️☺️☺️

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Alexandria Marrow's avatar

Ahhh those kinds of questions can feel so loaded, like your worth is tied to your answer (but it isn't!). 👀 What gave you the courage to share your writing more? I'm excited to check out Reflections at Donn. And I love that you’re adopting the “What’s been lighting you up lately?" question. I think it’s a thoughtful way to shift the focus to what truly matters. I hope it sparks some incredible conversations for you. ✨

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donnaié.'s avatar

Yes! I absolutely agree with you!

Multiple things gave me courage. Initially, I wanted to find my audience, build a community online, just record my writing journey but after joining a writing group, I realized that it was more than those things. I really wanted to improve my writing, how I express myself, and connect with other people. And along the way, I still end up making great friends with some kindhearted folks so there’s that lol. I feel like Reflections is a combo of all those things! Thank you for asking. I hope this reply ain’t too long 😅

And yes, that question is everythinggg✨

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